Author: ckratzer (Page 4 of 28)

Thankful For Nothing

November 25, 2020 / / 3 Comments

In a world of everything, I am thankful for nothing.

I know, it feels like everything—that thing that you did…

You made a mistake, you screwed up—words you said, choices you made, plans you created. The moment got the best of you, it wasn’t supposed to happen that way—everything spiraling out of control. The crack on the ceiling became the whole house falling. It was bad—really, really bad.

So now, you run, but you can’t run fast enough—the medication, can’t medicate deep enough. Your success, can’t be successful enough. What you want to let go, won’t seem to let go—the guilt, the shame, the cost, the regret. At times, it’s all so overwhelming. What you did, it feels like—everything.

In your mind it’s haunting you, certainly this is all reason for His doubt, reason for His questioning—reason for your one-eye-open living. Will you get the ax? Will God storm out of the heavens like a drunk out of a bar—put you in your place under an angry thumb? Is this the time you pushed Him too far?

I know, it feels like everything—that thing that happened to you…

They stole your innocence, betrayed your trust—said terrible things, did terrible things. It wasn’t fair, wasn’t right—completely wrong in every way—stealing things that can’t be replaced. The hurts run deep, straight to the arteries of your soul—you’ll never be the same. Tragedy has many faces—some innocent, some not. You weren’t suppose to be alone, but now you are—the chair where they sat—now empty. No greater pain you have ever felt than being without, being alone—once loving in the physical, to now love in memory only.

So, you run, but you can’t run fast enough—the medication, can’t medicate deep enough. Your success, can’t be successful enough. What you want to let go, won’t seem to let go—the bitterness, the anger, the revenge—the hurt, the loss, the emptiness. What happened to you, it feels like—everything.

That’s why, in your mind, the questions pound you—is He real, was He asleep at the wheel? How could this ever happen under a God who’s supposed to be so loving? Beating His chest, crying every tear, feeling hung out to dry—perhaps these doubts should have been doubted long before. What you thought was a trust now seems so un-trustable.

I know, it feels like everything—what you are doing, who you are becoming, the life you are living…

The real you, the fake you, something in between—your secret thoughts, insecurities, desires, dreams. Passions in your heart—if only to love and be loved in return—declared of value, overflowing with worth. Fully accepted—never to die with your song still inside. You’ve got one life—air to breathe, breaths to take. Am I good enough? Am I like-able, love-able? Do I qualify “as is,” or something different? Status, labels, “likes” on Facebook—I don’t want to waste anytime. Fit in here, fit in there—maybe have no fit at all. Am I getting this right? Doing this well?

And so you run, but you can’t run fast enough—the medication, can’t medicate deep enough. Your success, can’t be successful enough. What you want to let go, won’t seem to let go—the insecurities, the uncertainties, the voices in your head—the naysayers, fair-weather players—the push to be seen, heard, affirmed, believed.

What you are doing, who you are becoming, the life you are living—it feels like—everything.

That’s why, in this world of everything, I am so thankful for nothing.

For nothing can subtract from God’s love for you. Nothing can change His mind, reduce His delight—kink the garden hose of His favor drenching you.

No mistake, no miscue, no atrocity—nothing of you can edit anything of Him.

All decided, once and for all—God’s perfect, unconditional, unrestricted love. Always has, always is, always will be, for there is nothing more pure and more sure than God’s heart—His love, His affections for you—nothing.

There’s nothing for Him to reexamine, to revaluate, to retract—nothing from Him withheld, reserved, restrained.

Nothing.

Nothing else is God but love—perfect, eternal, unconditional, unlimited love. All, poured out for you, for me, for everyone.

In a world of everything, I am thankful for nothing.

For nothing can improve upon the you that God has already finished—there’s nothing of blemish, nothing of sin, nothing of darkness in you within. Nothing to work on, nothing to strive for, nothing to earn—you are whole, complete, righteous, forgiven, forever pure. It’s nothing of what you do, only everything of what He did—there’s nothing left to do, only everything to believe, in Him

It’s not about what people think—not what people say. Not the height of your attitude, not the depth of your gratitude—nothing half empty, nothing half full. Nothing of your religious effort, believing, or work—nothing at all.

Nothing to fear, nothing of which to be ashamed, nothing of tarnish upon your name.

You are righteousness, when you get it all wrong—you are success, when failures go on and on—you are whole, even as it all unravels to the ground.

As He is, so are you—nothing less than the beauty of Jesus—nothing.

In a world of everything, I am thankful for nothing.

For nothing is the sum distance between you and God—He is beside you, within you, all around you, as you. Nothing closer, nothing thicker, nothing more real than the realness of His hand holding yours—you have never been alone.

He is your strength when yours is nothing—He is your guide, when your sight sees nothing. He is your hope, when hope seems like nothing.

Grace is awakening to the hug God has always had around you—a Grace that nothing can remove.

So, in a world of everything, I am so thankful for nothing.

Absolutely… nothing.

For in the nothing, I find everything for which to be thankful…

Nothing.

 

Grace is brave. Be brave.

–Check out Chris Kratzer’s new book getting rave reviews… Leatherbound Terrorism.

In Leatherbound Terrorism, Chris chases the evils of conservative Evangelicalism out of the shadows and gives powerful voice to the cries of the religiously oppressed. Confronting issues like racism, sexism, homophobia, religious greed, hypocrisy, nationalism, white supremacy, privilege, and the weaponizing of the Bible, Leatherbound Terrorism pulls no punches. Endorsed by best selling authors Steve McVey and Baxter Kruger, Leatherbound Terrorism will challenge you, inspire you, and most certainly cause you to rethink your faith and life.

Sorry, Christian Trump Supporter, I Just Can’t Trust You Anymore

November 19, 2020 / / 12 Comments

It used to be different.

I may not have always agreed with you, but I respected you and your views. It seemed as if being a person of truth and goodness was a value we mutually upheld.

Sure, we haven’t always seen eye to eye, but I never thought it would come to this.

Everything has changed.

So much, that as difficult as it is to say and an even more difficult reality to swallow, if I’m honest, I just can’t trust you anymore. I wish things were different, but they’re not.

Somehow, someway, you still support Trump.

From where I sit, the person you once were is no longer the person you have become.

It baffles me to my core.

Even after he publicly mocks the disabled, brags about “grabbing pussy,” swindles people for cash, labels brown-skinned people as criminals, bullies his perceived enemies, embraces racism and white supremacy, pays off porn stars, lies incessantly, and pimps conspiracy theories, you still give him your “amen” and “hallelujah.”

How can this be?

Are you really that blind and callous?

For Christ’s sake, you won’t even wear a damn mask to protect the life of your neighbor. Your church won’t practice social distancing for the thwarting of a deadly pandemic. And, worse yet, you actually believe Trump was sent by God with anointing.

You actually teach your children to admire him.

You donate your money and your heart to his narcissism.

You give headspace to his lies and ridiculous conspiracy theories.

You give him a pass on everything you have fiercely denounced in others.

You twist the Bible like a breakdancer on crack and rape the person of Jesus in order to rationalize your addiction to power and preferential treatment within society.

Hell, you can’t even see your own white privilege staring you straight in the face.

Trust me, it’s a hard thing to say and even a harder thing to behold, but you’ve come off the rails of having a capacity for discernment and self-control. Your moral compass is calibrated to the black hole of your selfishness, and your soul worships a golden calf glittered with white, conservative Christian supremacy. In the end, there is nearly nothing evangelical, Christian, loving, or Jesus-esque about you. Like the Wizard behind the curtain, the sheep’s clothing that garments your veneer has been torn wide open to reveal the wolf that has long lurked inside you.

I still can’t believe it.

If you can’t see Trump for who he is, your faith for the evil it embraces, and yourself for the person you have become, how am I supposed to see you in my life?

If you lack the courage and clarity to stand for what is right and stand against what is wrong, where should you stand in my life?

I’m sorry, Christian Trump supporter, I just can’t trust you anymore.

The writing is on the wall.

 

I can’t trust you with educating my children.

I can’t trust you with speaking into my spiritual life.

I can’t trust what you say about God.

 

I can’t trust you with advising my values and choices.

I can’t trust you to discern good from bad.

I can’t trust you to steer away from fact-denying.

I can’t even trust you to have my best interests at heart.

 

I can’t trust you to tell the truth.

I can’t trust you to discern evil.

I can’t trust you to be fair.

I can’t even trust you to denounce murder and violence.

 

I can’t trust you with my friends.

I can’t trust you with my family.

I can’t trust you with my safety.

I can’t even trust you with the little things.

Little things like holding my mail, serving me food, and walking my dog.

 

Yes, it’s that serious, Yes, it’s that real. Yes, it’s that specific.

Your allegiance to his ridiculousness is the betrayal of our relationship.

So, until you can vehemently reject Trump’s brutal policies of family separations and kids in cages, you can stop lecturing me about being pro-life.

Until you can mandate the removal of police brutality, economic and racial injustice, and educational segregation, you can put down your microphone, “all lives matter.”

Until you are willing to tear down walls of discrimination, racism, and the unwelcoming of refugees, foreigners, and immigrants, you can keep your Old Testament quotations to yourself.

Until you turn the focus towards repenting of your own sins and the sins of your conservative Evangelical faith, you can forget about making me into your spiritual project and Chia Pet-for-Jesus as you hope to grow me into your hypocritical system of believing.

Until you cease to pursue the nationalism of your faith and a false religious freedom that is bent towards your benefit, can you stop trying to convince me that you worship Jesus and not Caesar.

Until you learn to lean not on your own understanding, put people first, and embrace the divinity and affirmation of all, you can stop insisting you occupy the inside scoop on God, the Bible, and how everyone else should be living.

Until you publicly reject the white, sexist, Republican, gun-wielding Jesus of conservative Evangelicalism, you can throw in the towel of your futile attempts to convince me that you worship the Jesus of Nazareth.

Until your faith becomes about the least-of-these instead of the privileged-of-these, the least-of-these instead of the whitest-of-these, the least-of-these instead of the sexist-of-these, and the least-of-these instead of the self-righteous-of-these, you can take everything about your faith, everything about your beliefs, and everything about who you have become and dance it all in front of me, but the scales have fallen from eyes and the truth has set me free.

Your loyalty to Trump has shown me everything I need to know about you, your faith, and the god you serve.

You can’t be trusted.

So, let me save you some time and disheartenment.

I will not believe the beliefs you believe.

I will not worship the idols to which you bow.

I will not become the evil you have become.

And most of all, I will not open my eyes, my heart, nor my life to any person or entity like you whose faith is so dedicated and committed to seeking its own way, that it is even willing to discriminate, demonize, and destroy all that is true, good, factual, and humane.

Sorry, Christian Trump Supporter, I just can’t trust you anymore.

And, to be honest, it scares me that I ever did.

 

Grace is brave. Be brave.

–Check out Chris Kratzer’s new book getting rave reviews… Leatherbound Terrorism.

In Leatherbound Terrorism, Chris chases the evils of conservative Evangelicalism out of the shadows and gives powerful voice to the cries of the religiously oppressed. Confronting issues like racism, sexism, homophobia, religious greed, hypocrisy, nationalism, white supremacy, privilege, and the weaponizing of the Bible, Leatherbound Terrorism pulls no punches. Endorsed by best selling authors Steve McVey and Baxter Kruger, Leatherbound Terrorism will challenge you, inspire you, and most certainly cause you to rethink your faith and life.

Essentials For Dealing With Christian Trump-Supporters

September 4, 2020 / / 12 Comments

Let’s face it, living in MAGA world is vomitus. With every Trump tweet, gathering, speech, and interview, it all makes us want to sprawl feverishly to the barf bucket. Yet, perhaps what can even be worse, is finding ourselves in proximity and conversation with our Christian, Trump-supporting friends and family. From Facebook posts and pictures, to yard signs and flags, nothing triggers the gag reflexes more than a slice of white, conservative Christian, privileged pie. 

Most of us want to get along and find ways to create peace with all of our friends and family. But, when it comes to our Christian, Trump-supporting tribe, we find ourselves at a loss. We fidget, bite our tongues, look the other way, and Google search the best methods of people-avoidance, camouflaging an emotional breakdown, and stopping ourselves short from punching them in the throat.  

Are there any solutions for dealing with a Christian, Trump-supporter that can actually work without losing ourselves and our insanity? 

Here’s some ideas that are working for me.

1- Understand, You Won’t Change Their Mind-

If changing the mind of your Christian, Trump-supporting friends or family is your goal, chances are, you’ll be pitching a tent in the land of disappointment and frustration. To be sure, the rare moments when we influence change are wonderful, but harboring this expectation is often counterproductive.

Instead, set your mind on engaging your friends and family for other reasons such as a) being true to yourself b) standing in solidarity with those who are oppressed or have little-to-no voice c) or chasing evil out of the shadows. 

A change of mind most frequently happens when there has been a change of heart. A change of heart happens best when there has been an experience that causes the person to genuinely consider the possibility, ”Maybe I’m wrong?” Know for sure, that until this soul searching occurs with real motivation, a change of mind that turns a person away from supporting Trump is unlikely. Unfortunately, all the facts, statistics, and elegant arguments we bring to the table, matter very little (if at all).  

Remember, their change of mind and heart isn’t up to you, and certainly, it’s not your responsibility.  

However, the best way to lay the groundwork for transformation is to listen first and repeatedly put forth the question, “Help me understand…” For example, to your Christian, Trump-supporting friends or family members, you can ask, “Help me understand, how can you, as a Christian, support a President who displays so many attitudes and behaviors that are deemed immoral, sinful, and hateful in any religion, let alone Christianity?

Stick with that formula. Rinse and repeat. 

Listen and ask, “Help me understand…” 

Then, if you feel like responding, you can focus your response by staying true to yourself with words like, “I respect your views, but if you’re open, here’s what I think…” 

Or, you can focus your response by speaking up for those who have been oppressed or have little-to-no voice. For example, you could assert, “I just think it’s sad that we live in a country so obsessed with guns that children have to live every day in fear of school shootings.” 

Or, you can focus your response on chasing evil out of the shadows. For example, you could ask, “Why is it that 60% of conservative Christian pastors admit to having problems with porn and yet you support a President who has committed adultery multiple times and boasts of ‘grabbing pussy?’ Help me understand.”  

Whatever you do, as much as possible, stay calm and collected. Don’t become the evil done against you, and certainly, don’t lower yourself to their misery.

Chances are, you aren’t going to change their mind, but you will be able to look yourself in the mirror as you honor your soul, do your part to thwart the powers of evil, and let the least-of-these know (who are watching–and they are watching) that they have been heard and have a person in you who stands in solidarity with them and will be their voice where they have little-to-none.

2- Stop Talking About Jesus- 

When it comes to our conservative, Trump-supporting, Christian friends and family, we gotta stop talking about Jesus.

Why? Because, for many, they don’t give a rip about Jesus. Their support of Trump isn’t about Jesus and their faith hasn’t been either. If it were about Jesus, they wouldn’t be a right-wing, conservative Christian and they wouldn’t support Trump. 

So, instead, focus on their selfishness. 

Hold up a mirror to their unrelenting desire to lord their values and assert dominance in all of society, even at the cost, suffering, and unfair treatment of all others. Open the sewer of their insatiable hunger for white, conservative Christian privilege at the expense of the freedom and equality of others. Focus on their willingness to give unlimited pass to sin, immorality, violence, and duplicity in order to protect and prosper their way of living. Focus on their willingness to take up arms but refuse to wear masks. Focus on their willingness to let people suffer and die in the wake of their religious pursuits and ideologies. 

Focus on their racism. 

Pull back the scab of their hypocritical treatment of a black President over their lust for a lying, bullying, unrepentant, white President who beats the drums of nationalizing their faith. Focus on their willingness to allow (and even foster) systemic racism while turning a deaf ear to their white privilege. Open the playbook of their double standards towards their own protests versus the protests of the black community. Focus on their highjacking of America in hopes of ridding it of true diversity, human equality, and religious freedom.

Focus on their failure to love their neighbor as themselves. 

Shine a light on their unwillingness to welcome the foreigner, give hospitality to strangers, treat the immigrant as a citizen, heal the sick, feed the poor, and place their needs last and those of others as first. Expose their worship of economic systems that exploit the vulnerable, subdue the minority, and coddle the rich. Reveal their deep lack of love for their enemies and their allowance of violent, profane rhetoric towards those they hate. Focus on their microscopic policing of the lives of others while spiritually rationalizing their own debauchery. Pull back the curtain of their oppression of women and the LGBTQ community under the guise of asserting morality, when instead, it’s really about thwarting those who would threaten their patriarchy through the emergence of true equality.

Focus on their hate.

Focus on their brutality.

Focus on their inhumanity

Stop talking about Jesus.

Start talking about the hypocritical, selfish, racist, unloving, bullying, judging, and uncompassionate person their faith and support of Trump has led them to become.

3- Take The Abortion Card Out Of The Game-

You know as well as I do that white, conservative Christians would love for us all to believe that, despite some of them having a distaste for certain attributes of President Trump, they give their loyalty to him because they see him as anti-abortion and pro-life. In their reasoning, this issue supersedes all others. They argue that the protection and preservation of the most vulnerable of human life is paramount. 

Indeed, this justification by conservative Christians may help them feel good about themselves as they believe that they are taking the higher road and aligning themselves with the Bible and God’s will. However, in truth, for many, their stance against abortion is the ultimate cop-out. Where all other excuses for their support of Trump have revealed their hypocrisy, their position against abortion is the last card in their deck, and it too, is the ultimate bluff. 

To be sure, many progressives greatly dislike the idea of abortion, but also dislike the subjugation of women’s rights, the denial of science, and the belittling of medical truth, especially at the feet of a brutal, hypocritical, conservative Christian patriarchy. In fact, I’ve never met nor heard of any progressive, pro-choice person who cherishes the idea and act of abortion. For them, this issue of abortion is both complex, heart-wrenching, and grey in nature. 

However, this is not the case for much of white, male-driven, conservative Christianity. With their obvious preferences of school shootings over gun control, children in cages over welcoming the foreigner, police brutality over police accountability, mass incarceration over racial justice, a rich-favored economy over care for the least-of-these, the military industrial complex over universal healthcare and economic justice for all, and the worship of a god who joyfully sends those who don’t subscribe to their faith system to a hell of eternal torment, their priorities and values are crystal clear. There is almost nothing “pro-life” about right-wing, conservative Christianity. And quite frankly, when it’s all said and done, they don’t give a shit. With tremendous fear of losing control, power, and privilege, instead of coming clean of their duplicity, they cling all-the-more tighter to their MAGA hats. Indeed, their vehement declarations of being pro-life and anti-abortion are the ultimate cop-out. 

In fact, it should be of no surprise to anyone that, for many conservative Christians, their stance on abortion isn’t about being “for” Jesus, not even close. Instead, it’s about being “against” the full fruition of women’s equality, the sexual accountability of white men, and the cessation of their religious dominance to dictate the lives of all others. This is why they support Trump under the guise of being anti-abortion. Clearly, the only lives that matter to him are his own and that of white, male-driven, American, conservative Christians. There is almost nothing “pro-life” about the presidency of Donald Trump, and many white, conservative Christians are totally cool with that as long as he joins them and leads the way in dismantling the enemies of their pursuit of supremacy. 

When it’s all said and done, history and statistics tell the tale, many of our conservative, Trump-supporting Christian friends and family members are only as pro-life and pro-birth as it benefits their white, conservative Christian supremacy. Hard to hear, but true.

Trust me, if white, conservative Christian men could get pregnant, abortion would not only be legal, it would be biblical, easily accessible, and free. Not just that, but probably offered next to the church coffee shop or bookstore in the lobby after Sunday services. 

4- Love From A Distance- 

See, spiritual issues are huge, and anything to do with Trump is, at the heart, a spiritual issue. 

With our Trump-supporting Christian friends and family, asserting your beliefs and values is absolutely crucial. To not do so can mean leaving others in harm’s way because of our failure to resist. If we don’t take a stand, who will? 

However, when we keep our conversations with Trump-supporting Christians centered on the core issues of spirituality and integrity, we expose the cancer of their evil system of beliefs. When this happens and the truth is revealed, don’t be surprised when the gloves come off and the monster is unleashed. This can even become emotionally and physically violent and personal boundaries need to be set and respected.

Most certainly, as courageous as we want to be, there is a time to step back from the battle and love from a distance. When a person’s behavior or words become harmful to you or others, there can be no more “agree to disagree.” In those moments, it may be very important to continue to assert your views, but from an emotional and even physical distance. To do so is not giving up or bowing down to their views. Instead, it’s either creating space to stay in the game for the long term, or acknowledging that the circumstances are simply beyond your influence. 

The noble goal that declares, “I am not going to let politics come in between my relationships” is admirable, but often unrealistic and even cowardly. These are highly critical times and highly critical issues that define who we are and desperately affect the lives of many. Taking a stand is absolutely essential if the context for change is ever going to be established. Unfortunately, this can cost the price of important relationships, even family. Yet, this is a cost that must be paid. Thankfully, where possible, loving from distance can allow the needed separation without completely abandoning the relationship.

Yet, sometimes you have to pull the parachute before you crash into the ground. Walking away from debates, arguments, guilt trips, passive aggressiveness, and outright evil before they destroy you must be an option on the relationship table. If being you requires appeasing them, it’s time to love from a distance. Perhaps, a very long emotional, spiritual, and physical distance.

Indeed, these are relationally anxious, stressful, and divisive times that cut the core of who we are, what we believe, and what we value. 

Now more than ever, it’s time for us to take our stand.

Be you. 

Believe what you believe.

Find your voice.

Stand for the least-of-these.

Never give up, and never give in.

 

Grace is brave. Be brave. 

 

Abortion: The Ultimate Evangelical Cop-out

August 18, 2020 / / 26 Comments

Trump is the middle finger of white, male-driven, conservative Evangelicalism. He’s the scab-picker of a long-festering, pungent hate among many white American Christians towards the things they feel are an increasing threat to their white, conservative Christian way of life and privilege in society. 

Yet, the difference is obvious, Trump is nothing like Jesus, the central figure of Christianity. A simple comparison of their character and ways reveal this truth.

However, none of that matters. So many Christians, in essence, don’t give a damn. For them, there is literally nothing Trump could say or do that would dislodge their obedience towards him. This has left analysts and Trump-disgusted Christians trying to crack-the-code as to how anyone who associates with Jesus could place their support and allegiance in such an anti-Jesus man and President.

The answer is simple. 

White, male-driven, conservative American Christianity has taken the person of Jesus who stands “for” so many beautiful things and twisted Him into a religion centered around the destruction of what they stand “against.” In truth, the Trump supporter isn’t concerned with what Trump is doing “for” Jesus, but rather intoxicated by what he is doing “against” their contrived enemies.

For example, let’s take the white, male-driven, Christian colonization of America, their unwavering support of Israel, their “mission” to convert non-believers, and the brutal eradication of Native Americans. No matter how much “Reaching the world for Christ” or “Manifest Destiny Lipstick” you put on that pig, when your bottom line purpose is to make the world more “like” you and “for” you, anyone and anything that doesn’t foster and surrender to that agenda becomes a bright blip on the radar screen of the enemies you stand “against.” That’s right, so many of the spiritually wrapped actions of white, male-driven, conservative Christianity have never been “for” Jesus, but rather “against” the things that threaten the presence and prosperity of their privileged Empire.

The same applies to Trump’s Muslim travel ban, the border wall, and the increased demand for so-called religious freedom. None of it is about protecting our country from terrorism, illegal immigration, crime, nor fostering true religious pluralism. Instead, it’s about giving leverage and privilege to white, male-driven, conservative American Christianity through the demonizing, marginalizing, and belittling of all other religions and peoples.

Think about the LGBTQ community. White, male-driven, conservative American Christianity wants us all to believe that their vehement disgust with this issue is because it’s a sin that offends God and undermines our culture. Excuse me, but that’s hilarious. 

What white, male-driven American Christianity cares about within the LGBTQ community is their relentless desire for shared rights. They can’t stand the idea that heterosexual patriarchy would have to share equal value, priority, influence, protections, space, and rights with any group besides themselves. If they cared about sin, they would be spending all their time policing the mountain high pile of debauchery rampant within their own camp and the numbers among them who, ironically, enjoy lesbian porn. Instead, they demonize and stand “against” the LGBTQ community, not because they are “for” dealing with sin (which LGBTQ it is not), but because they don’t want to share their heterosexual, patriarchal privilege.

Starting to connect the dots? 

This is the root impulse behind every form of their oppression of minorities and their social and political aspirations. White, male-driven, conservative American Christianity wants power, control, and prominence in all of society, and they will use whatever methods to achieve this goal. Slavery, mass incarceration, lynchings, police brutality, tear gas, denial of rights, economic inequality, sexism, voter suppression, rigged elections, dictatorships, lying, labeling, demonizing, false-flag operations, fraud, constitutional abuse, and the list is unending. They don’t give-a-rip about aligning their values and pursuits to be “for” Jesus, they only care about aligning their lives and spinning their faith “against” anything and everything that threatens their appetite and addiction to self preservation and prosperity.  

Enter abortion.

White, male-driven, conservative Evangelicalism would love for us all to believe that, despite some of them having a distaste for certain attributes of President Trump, they give their loyalty to him because they see him as anti-abortion and pro-life. In their reasoning, this issue supersedes all others. They argue that the protection and preservation of the most vulnerable of human life is paramount. 

Indeed, this justification by white Evangelicals may help them feel good about themselves as they believe that they are taking the higher road and aligning themselves with the Bible and God’s will. However, in truth, for many, their stance against abortion is the ultimate cop-out. Where all other excuses for their support of Trump have revealed their hypocrisy, their position against abortion is the last card in their deck, and it too, is the ultimate bluff. 

To be sure, many progressives greatly dislike the idea of abortion, but also dislike the subjugation of women’s rights, the denial of science, and the belittling of medical truth, especially at the feet of a brutal, hypocritical, conservative Evangelical patriarchy. In fact, I’ve never met nor heard of any progressive, pro-choice person who cherishes the idea and act of abortion. For them, this issue of abortion is both complex, heart-wrenching, and grey in nature. 

However, this is not the case for much of white, male-driven, conservative Evangelicalism. With their obvious preferences of school shootings over gun control, children in cages over welcoming the foreigner, police brutality over police accountability, mass incarceration over racial justice, a rich-favored economy over care for the least-of-these, the military industrial complex over universal healthcare and economic justice for all, and the worship of a god who joyfully sends those who don’t subscribe to their faith system to a hell of eternal torment, their priorities and values are crystal clear. There is almost nothing “pro-life” about white, male-driven, conservative Evangelical Christianity. And quite frankly, when it’s all said and done, they don’t give it shit. With tremendous fear of losing control, power, and privilege, instead of coming clean of their duplicity, they cling all-the-more tighter to their MAGA hats. Indeed, their vehement declarations of being pro-life and anti-abortion are the ultimate cop-out. 

In fact, it should be of no surprise to anyone that, for many, their white, male-driven, conservative Evangelical stance on abortion isn’t about being “for” Jesus, not even close. Instead, it’s about being “against” the full fruition of women’s equality, the sexual accountability of white men, and the cessation of their religious dominance to dictate the lives of all others. This is why they support Trump under the guise of being anti-abortion. Clearly, the only lives that matter to him are his own and that of white, male-driven, American, conservative Evangelicals. There is almost nothing “pro-life” about the presidency of Donald Trump, and many white, conservative Evangelicals are totally cool with that as long as he joins them and leads the way in dismantling the enemies of their pursuit of supremacy. 

Given the benefit of the doubt, some would suggest that white, conservative Evangelicals are at least “pro-birth.” Excuse me, but that’s also hilarious. They might be “for” white, conservative Evangelical birth. But, they certainly are “against” the birth of a lesbian, gay, bissexual, or transgender person. Sure, they declare that being LGBTQ is a choice after birth. However, that’s because it’s more palatable to condemn a “choice” than it is to condemn God’s designed “creation”–an LGBTQ person from birth. 

But, not just against an LGBTQ birth, but “against” every black, brown, or multi-racial birth. Sure, some will warm-up to minorities and act as if they support equality. Within white, male-driven, conservative American Christianity there is a certain level of diversity they are willing to accept as long as they can patronize it, exploit it, and it doesn’t threaten their dominance in society. However, when that diversity finds its wings and it starts to feel like it’s crossing the line by encroaching the sandbox of their privilege and power, all bets are off and the bully is released. 

For these are the demographics that ultimately pose the threat of thwarting and dismantling their white, male-driven, conservative Evangelical supremacy. In fact, seeing how prominent and acceptable racism has become for many white Evangelicals, I am surprised they don’t have underground black and brown abortion clinics. Oh wait, they do, they’re just called voter suppression, racial injustice, children in cages, mass incarceration, police brutality, economic inequality, and “all lives matter.” 

No, they would never come out and say it that way and would deny these assertions fervently, but systemically and subtly it’s all true. 

With their protests demanding their God-given freedom to NOT wear a mask in order to protect the lives and prevent the deaths of other people as they ironically wave signs declaring, “My body, my choice,” the reason why so much of white, male-driven, conservative Evangelical Christianity makes such a big deal about abortion isn’t because they are “for” life, “for“ birth, or “for” Jesus. Not a chance. Rather, it’s because they are “against” the emergence of true equality for women, the sexual accountability of white men, and the dismantling of their religious power to lord their values over all of society. 

Indeed, the conservative Evangelical stance against abortion is the ultimate Evangelical cop-out, especially in justifying their support of Trump.

Trust me, if white, conservative Evangelical men could get pregnant, abortion would not only be legal, it would be biblical, easily accessible, and free. Not just that, but probably offered next to the church coffee shop or bookstore in the lobby after Sunday services. 

 

Grace is brave. Be brave.

The Real Reason Many Christians Support Trump

August 10, 2020 / / 24 Comments

The difference is obvious, Trump is nothing like Jesus. A simple comparison of their character and ways reveal this truth.

Yet, so many Christians, in essence, don’t give a damn. For them, there is literally nothing he could say or do that would dislodge their obedience towards Trump. This has left analysts and Trump-disgusted Christians trying to crack the code as to how anyone who associates with Jesus could place their support and allegiance in such an anti-Jesus man and President.

The answer is simple. 

White, male-driven, conservative American Christianity has taken the person of Jesus who stands “for” so many beautiful things and twisted Him into a religion centered around the destruction of what they stand “against.” In truth, the Trump supporter isn’t concerned with what Trump is doing “for” Jesus, but rather intoxicated by what he is doing “against” their contrived enemies.

For example, for most white conservative Christians, converting people to Christ isn’t really about getting people into heaven, no matter how much they try to wrap their efforts with spiritual ribbons and bows. Instead, it serves as a weapon towards the dismantling of those religions they are “against.” Ultimately, their overarching concern isn’t about taking more people with them into the next world. Rather, their deepest care is centered around making this world more “like” themselves and more “for” themselves. Therefore, all the religions and beliefs that don’t fit their mold and foster their privilege are pinned upon the map of their enemies. In their mind, we can’t have a world where other religions and faiths are of equal value, worth, truth, rights, and influence. So, conversion thwarts this feared reality in hopes of ridding it completely from the planet via assimilation or persecution. For if white Christians were altruistically concerned about the eternity of their unbelieving neighbors, they’d be hitting the streets every moment of every day with a serving and sacrificial kind of love that couldn’t be resisted. But, they aren’t.

This is true of the white, male-driven, Christian colonization of America, their unwavering support of Israel, and the brutal eradication of Native Americans. No matter how much Manifest Destiny Lipstick you put on that pig, when your bottom line purpose is to make the world more “like” you and “for” you, anyone and anything that doesn’t foster and surrender to that agenda becomes a bright blip on the radar screen of the enemies you stand “against.”

This is also true of Trump’s Muslim travel ban, the border wall, and the increased demand for so-called religious freedom. None of it is about protecting our country from terrorism, illegal immigration, crime, nor fostering true religious pluralism. Instead, it’s about giving leverage and privilege to white, male-driven, conservative American Christianity through the demonizing, marginalizing, and belittling of all other religions and peoples.

This is why many so-called Christians are unwavering with their loyalty towards Trump, he falls in line and beats the drums of their rage towards all the things they hate. It has nothing to do with what Trump is doing “for” Jesus, it’s about what he is doing “against” their perceived enemies.

Think about the LGBTQ community. White, male-driven, conservative American Christianity wants us all to believe that their vehement disgust with this issue is because it’s a sin that offends God and undermines our culture. Excuse me, but that’s hilarious. 

What white, male-driven American Christianity cares about within the LGBTQ community is their relentless desire for shared rights. They can’t stand the idea that heterosexual patriarchy would have to share equal value, priority, influence, protections, space, and rights with any group besides themselves. If they cared about sin, they would be spending all their time policing the mountain high pile of debauchery rampant within their own camp and the numbers among them who, ironically, enjoy lesbian porn. Instead, they demonize and stand “against” the LGBTQ community, not because they are “for” dealing with sin (which LGBTQ it is not), but because they don’t want to share their heterosexual, patriarchal privilege.

The same is true of their oppression of other minorities. Within white, male-driven, conservative American Christianity there is a certain level of diversity they are willing to accept as long as they can patronize it, exploit it, and it doesn’t threaten their dominance in society. However, when that diversity finds its wings and starts to feel like it is crossing the line by encroaching the sandbox of their privilege and power, all bets are off and the bully is released. 

This is the root impulse behind every form of their oppression of minorities. White, male-driven, conservative American Christianity wants power, control, and prominence in all of society, and they will use whatever methods to achieve this goal. Slavery, mass incarceration, lynchings, police brutality, tear gas, denial of rights, economic inequality, sexism, voter suppression, rigged elections, dictatorships, lying, labeling, denying science, weaponizing the Bible, demonizing, false-flag operations, fraud, constitutional abuse, and the list is unending. They don’t give-a-rip about aligning their values and pursuits with Jesus, they only care about aligning their lives and spinning their faith “against” anything and everything that threatens their appetite and addiction to self preservation and prosperity.  

Once again for the people in the back, this is why white, male-driven, conservative American Christians are unwavering with their loyalty towards Trump. He echoes and magnifies their rage towards the things they fear and hate. It’s not about what he is doing “for” Jesus, it’s about what he is doing “against” the people and things they fear will undermine their privileged way of life. In their minds, this country is for them, given by God to them, and should always serve and reflect them above all things. Some will “tolerate” a certain amount of controlled “sharing” as long as they’re still king of the mountain. It helps them sleep at night and convince themselves that they aren’t racist, sexist, or white privileged. However, to the privileged, the emergence of true equality always feels like war, a war they must fight. That’s how you know where racism truly lives; look for the subtle “actions” against, and the subtle “inactions” towards true equality.  

See, when people criticize white, conservative American Christians for not being “for” Jesus or for supporting a President who isn’t “for” Jesus, it all rolls off their back because ultimately it isn’t about being “for” Jesus anyways. It’s about fighting a war “against” what threatens their privilege. That’s why they will perform all sorts of spiritual gymnastics, rationalize their duplicities, and do anything to divert attention away from the stark contrast between Trump, Republicans, conservative Evangelicalism and the person and ways of Jesus. For them, standing against and thwarting their enemies trumps following Jesus every time. All pun intended.

Therefore, it’s largely useless to argue with Trump supporters about Jesus. To them, He’s irrelevant and can be rationalized away. Instead, what is relevant is their hate, fear, oppressiveness, and self-centeredness. Focusing on these issues is key. 

For these are the huge under-the-surface sins that have given rise to what we see on the surface of the iceberg of white, male-driven, conservative American Christianity today. Find me anything and everything that they stand “against” and it can be clearly connected, not to their love of humanity, freedom, or America, but to their hateful, fearful, oppressive, and self-centered desire to protect and prosper their white, male-driven, conservative Christian privilege and dominance in all of American society–period, full stop.

The real reason why many Christians support Trump isn’t about his being “for” Jesus, but about his being “against” the equality and diversity that threatens white, male-driven, conservative American Christian supremacy. 

 

Grace is brave. Be brave. 

No, Progressive Christian, You’re Not Insane

July 17, 2020 / / 17 Comments

Since the birth of Jesus upon the earth, those who choose His ways have been deemed by society as the freaks–the misguided–the losers–the libtards–the snowflakes. At points along the way, Jesus Himself was labeled as insane. Apparently, when you shake your fist at the forces of imperialism, greed, religiosity, and self-righteousness while bringing forth a cosmic movement of extravagant inclusion, equality, generosity, and grace, you’re going to get some dirt kicked in your face. Perhaps, even nailed upon a politically conspired cross constructed under sheets stained of religion. 

Yup, you’re going get the shit beaten out of you–emotionally, physically, socially, and spiritually. In fact, there’s a sure sense that if you aren’t being spun around like a breakdancer on crack for your resistance towards the conservative Evangelical Death Star, are you really even alive?

No doubt, it’s enough to cause even the bravest amongst us to shrink back and curl up in the fetal position of our discouragement. It seems like the forces of evil are taking the hill. The gaslighting is working. The Tweet storms hold their traction. What is up is down, and what is clear is clouded. The people of Light, the people of Love, the people of divine affirmation, the people of true equality, the people of humanity, the people of science, the people of generosity, the people of justice, the people of compassion, the people of Grace–we are the insane ones. 

Indeed, the patients are running the hospital. 

In moments like these it’s easy to wonder, “maybe I have lost my mind.” Maybe this life of solidarity with the least-of-these and fighting the forces of political and religious evil just isn’t worth it. The gravity of giving up weighs heavy, and conformity and surrender seem to be the only way out. Life could be so much easier if the blinds were closed, my eyes were turned away, and my heart was numbed. What difference does it make anyway?     

Yet, off in the distance a relentless voice is heard rising from the ashes, “Prepare the way of the Lord.” Make straight a path for justice to roll down like a mighty stream. Bind up the broken hearted. Declare the divine affirmation of all. Push aside all bigotry and hate. Pave every street with human equality. Line the sidewalks with social justice. Build statues of the least-of-these. Light every corner, crossing, and alley with the mind of Christ, that all truth and goodness might be revealed and seen.   

This is the voice upon your life.  

Take heart. 

No, you’re not insane.    

For if you gaze upon the horizon of much of American Christianity and it all makes you want to vomit, you’re not insane. 

If you have a growing suspicion that much of right-wing conservative Christianity is a diabolical, evil scheme that has little to do with Jesus and everything to do with power and privilege, you’re not insane. 

If you tire of a false gospel that puts conditions on love, fosters hypocrisy, inflames self-righteousness, and personifies God as an unpredictable monster, you’re not insane. 

If you’ve discerned that much of Christianity has raped and twisted God into a frequently-temperamental divine drunk storming out of a bar, you’re not insane. 

If you question a faith that features a hell of eternal torment designed for the divine torture of people who don’t return God’s love in all the conservative Evangelically prescribed ways, you’re not insane.

If something checks in your spirit about turning off your brain, subscribing to a 6,000 year old earth, requiring your wife’s submission, and joining a group of people who appear to excel at talking amongst themselves and judging the world, all while calling it faithfulness to Jesus, you’re not insane. 

If you’re super close to blowing yet another brain gasket the next time someone quotes Scripture at you in hopes of turning you into their spiritual project, you’re not insane. 

If your head is spinning and your heart is confounded at the sure reality that scores of conservative Christians boastfully claim loyalty to the ways of Jesus, yet still vehemently support an anti-Christ president, you’re not insane. 

If you’re fed up with feeling spiritually obligated to prequalify people for love, condemn the LGBTQ community, discriminate against minorities, embrace sexism, weaponize the Bible, and turn Jesus into the hood ornament of your world bulldozer as you seek the dominance and supremacy of your faith in all of society, you’re not insane.

If you see much of the same evils that plague conservative Christianity to also be rampant within progressive Christian circles, you’re not insane. 

If you feel like ditching the whole “Christian” label all together, you’re not insane. 

If you feel like the true spiritual path of your life is to simply find your own way with the Spirit’s guidance alone, you’re not insane.

If you tire of the racism that is fostered primarily by white male Christians, you’re not insane. 

If you want to vomit every time a white person says they are “color blind” but then wants to rub your face in “black on black” crime, you’re not insane. 

If you want to punch white Christians in the throat who want to declare “all lives matter” yet send their gay children to the curb, keep immigrants in cages, criminalize and dehumanize black people, celebrate the stripping of benefits for Transgender people, and hope to erase the LGBTQ community from the planet, you’re not insane. 

If it strikes you as ironic that some white people who want to help black people gain true equality, don’t see other white voices who are trying to help too as equal and equally valued, you’re not insane.

If it pisses you off that some Christians care more about their convenience than wearing a mask for the protection of others, you’re not insane.

If your neck veins pop out in rage because it’s becoming all too clear, even for Christians who declare loyalty to Jesus, that money is more important than people, you’re not insane.

If you want to denounce your pride and affection for “America” because of the unjust, bigoted, racist, and white supremacy-ladened sewer we have become, you’re not insane.

If you want to scream, “F*ck it all” at the top of your lungs as you pound the chest of your despair, you’re not insane.

No, you’re not insane. 

You’re not a heathen. You’re not a heretic, nor a snowflake.

No, you are Jesus.

 

Grace is brave. Be brave.

 

Questions For Every School Board Before Reopening

July 15, 2020 / / 1 Comment

The science is clear, Covid-19 has produced a dangerous and deadly pandemic. It’s nothing like the flu or the common cold. As of late, the amount of people contracting this virus has increased dramatically, largely because significant populations are unwilling to take even basic precautions. Regardless of fringe conspiracies and political bias, the urgency of this health and information crisis remains. Lives are at stake.

Enter, the reopening of schools.

This is truly where the rubber meets the road for our society. The choices of school boards will greatly reflect what our society values most and the maturity we have as humans in the face of crisis. As many are concerned, the clock is ticking to make critical decisions in regards to the reopening of schools that will affect the lives of everyone involved, not just students.  

In my opinion, as a parent and spouse of a teacher, the following are questions that must be raised and answered as school boards discern the best pathway forward. 

1) What is your priority, the lives of teachers and their families, students and their families, and staff and their families or in-person education? Which one is more important? Are you willing to take the clear and established risk of death that in-person education creates in exchange for an urgent reopening of schools with some form of in-person instruction?

2) Is delay of gratification an important principle for life and decisions? Is there room in your decision making to temporarily delay in-person education of any form for the sake of preventing the probability of permanent death to your students and their families, teachers and their families, or staff and their families?

3) How do you justify having virtual school board and leadership meetings for safety purposes yet ask students, teachers, and staff to participate in an in-person educational environment? 

4) If you measure a child’s temperature before entering an in-person educational environment, who will discern those students who have been medicated to reduce their fevers upon entering? Will temperatures be taken throughout the day? If so, who will be doing this? How will the school know if a child, teacher, or staff member tests positive for Covid-19? If a child presents symptoms of Covid-19 before or during school, what actions will be taken? If that child must remain at school, where will they go and who will monitor them?

5) When it’s known that a student, teacher, or staff member tests positive for Covid-19, will all persons having been in contact or proximity to them be required to quarantine for 14 days? When it’s a teacher or staff member, will they receive additional sick leave to cover their absence? When their recovery takes months, will they continue to be compensated even if they don’t have short-term disability? Knowing that some persons having had Covid 19 experience a return of the virus, will these students, teachers, or staff persons be allowed to return to an in-person instructional environment?

6) What becomes of the teacher or staff member who, due to their own medically validated health reasons or that of family members, is significantly placed at an even higher risk in an in-person educational environment and therefore refuses to do so? Will they be fired? Do they not have a civil right to work in a safe, educational environment as was established upon employment? Do you have teaching or staff options available with the same compensation and benefits for these high risk persons? Are you prepared for the numerous lawsuits that will ensue?

7) If masks or distancing are required in an in-person educational environment, what will be the consequences of violating these rules? Who will be enforcing these rules and consequences? Will there be different rules for different environments? If so, what are they and are they agreed upon?

8) What efforts have been made to hear from and solicit the concerns of your most important asset… teachers?  Have they been provided an autonomous environment from which to speak openly and honestly about their questions and concerns? What weight do those concerns carry?

9) In the end, what is the teaching moment for your school board in all of this? If you say that “The education of our students is the most important thing,” then how can that be achieved if they’re dead, their teacher is dead, or a staff member is dead–all unnecessarily? 

Is the removal of a temporary educational setback more important than people’s lives? Are academic performance, goals, and career ambitions more important than people’s lives? Is your alignment to personal politics more important than people’s lives? Are your personal agendas more important than people’s lives. As a school board, are the lives of students, teachers, and staff members expendable? In the months ahead, is the ultimate exam given to students, teachers, and staff going to be to see if they can stay alive? Instead of the EOG (End Of Grade) testing, will it be more like an EOL (End Of Life) testing?

In short, is your love of the idea of education more important than the reality of people’s lives? 

Choose wisely.

The lives of students, teachers, staff members and their families are literally all on you.

 

Grace is brave. Be brave.

From Jesus To The LGBTQ Community

June 16, 2020 / / 4 Comments

My dreams are made of you—from first light to the setting of the sun.

All that are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender—radiant shades and gleaming colors of the human tapestry. In every way, you’re beautifully and wonderfully made. The stars, dull in comparison to your splendor.

To those special souls who bear these human beings, conceived by the moving of My Spirit. You bring forth life—not just a life, but Light for all to see, exposing and revealing truth with every breath they breathe. Be it forever known in crystal clarity, you parent not just flesh and blood, but a cosmic awakening, pulsating from My creative majesty. Each one, a birthing from the throne so universe shaking—the mere truth of their divine being chases religious hearts out of deep seated shadows, setting free poets and prophets of true love and Grace in waves the size of eternity. Yours is an honor bestowed, a high privilege—the threads of Mary and Joseph spooled and weaved into the adornments of your calling.

All that are gay, all that are lesbian, all that are bisexual, all that are transgender, all of every shade of heaven in between—My dreams are made of you.

You are My smile that extends as far as the east is from the west. You are the joy the Father graciously sets before My chest.

You are the laughter that can’t be contained from the depths of My belly.

You are warmth of a winter’s fire, the breeze of a summer’s shower.

You are the echo of my voice through a river of mountains. You are the stream of sheer jubilation, welling up from My eternal fountain.

You are the delight that sends Me love-drunk into the streets. You are the pulse moving through My veins with every heart beat.

Forever and ever and ever I say—My dreams are made of you.

I know the hurt, the skin melting pain, the soul stripping floggings of condemnation.

When I was ridiculed and rejected by My own bigoted family—there I was thinking of you.

When I cried over Jerusalem, begging to be understood and simply accepted—there I was living as you.

When I was in the garden, on bended knee, begging for divine reprieve, my cup flowing over with doubts and hopelessness—there I was scared, just like you.

When I was left to die on a religiously conspired cross, murdered in body, mind, and spirit, crucified to death by ignorance and hate, while good people remain silent and unengaged—there I was dying, not just for you, but on the Tree… as you.

There has never been a time you have ever been alone.

You are not the forsaken.

You are not an abomination.

You are not a sin that needs reformation.

You owe no apology, no explanation, no verse, nor spiritual transformation.

This is your time, this is your permission, this is your affirmation, this is My decision.

Be you, be fully you—for My sake, for my Name, for my Fame throughout all the universe—be you, unashamed.

Everything I am, everything I make—everything that is of mine is forever and freely yours. You are the diamonds from which dreams are made—extravagantly, specifically, and intentionally created.

Bend your ear, release your soul, I’m shouting from the heavens—from the edge of My seat, the tip top of My heart.

Listen to the cry of My trinity, Three in One wrapped in infinity.

My dreams are made of you.

My dreams are made of you.

My dreams are made of—

You.

 

Grace is brave. Be brave.

The Apology Every White Christian Needs To Give To Black America

June 8, 2020 / / 8 Comments

I am white, I am Christian, I am the problem, and I am sorry.

I have sinned against you and God in thought, word, and deed—even more so, in the brutal absence of thoughts, words, and deeds rendered on your behalf.

Where words of fierce solidarity were desperately needed, I have been cowardly silent and withdrawn. Where you have been crying out to simply be heard, bestowed justice, and afforded basic human rights, I have been tone-policing your every move while sitting in the comfort of my white Christian couch, staring down my nose at your plight.

My ignorance to my own white privilege, my apathy to your suffering, my comfort in comfortable living, and the worship of my status—all complicit evils to the undeniable hell you have been living.

History tells the disturbing and diabolical tale, I am the reason for your slavery, your continued discrimination, and your unending quest to grasp what God has already bestowed upon you—equal value, capacity, dignity,  beauty, and worth in every way and in all things. You don’t just matter, you are the majesty woven into God’s tapestry of life.

I have declared peace where this is no peace—to your destruction and my shame.

I have highjacked Jesus and turned Him into my personal cruise director, sipping Christian cocktails while the conservative evangelical Titanic plows through and vomits out hatred, bigotry, racism, and greed from sea to shining sea. Not just towards you, but the LGBTQIA community, women, the impoverished, and the immigrant included (to name a few).

At times, I have assumed the worst in you while blatantly dismissing the obvious systemic and intended desire within significant segments of my faith and country to erase you.

I have not resisted nearly to the needed measure, but rather have even participated in a faith system that has been the source of more discrimination, abuse, and destruction of your being and community than perhaps any other racist evil manifestation on earth.

I have become the onward Christian soldier who pierces your side as you hang on racial crosses.

I have blindly turned my brain, conscience, soul, and mind off at church and in society—numbed and satisfied with only having, at best, a passing knowledge and compassion for your history, story, suffering, divine worth, and life experience.

My shrinking back at the Thanksgiving table, the church picnic, the office water cooler, the Facebook comment thread, and the sideline at soccer practice. My carting off the kids to schools where diversity in status, intellectual intelligence, emotional intelligence, and color of skin is subtly, but surely discouraged. My laziness and chilling absence in being an active force for equality in the public arena with my words, my votes, and my resistance. All, scream of my resounding confession—I am the reason for your living hell. George Floyd, just another page in the nightmares of your story.

When you were thirsty for equality, I was watering and walling-off my privilege—using God and the Bible to rationalize my evil.

When you were naked and vulnerable as a despised minority, I looked away sitting on my hands, and therefore exploited you and raped you of your humanity.

When you were hungry to create a world where all are given equal value, opportunity, freedom, and worth, my irresponsiveness and complacency stole from the table of your divine affirmation and significance in order to fatten my own.

I am appalled at myself as I come face to face with the personal responsibility I have surrendered, the indoctrination I have allowed, and the contamination I have embraced through the spiritual justification of hate spewing out of the sewers of America, largely from the toilets of right-wing, conservative Evangelical Christianity.

I repent and agree with God—until my voice and actions of non-violent solidarity are as loud, numerous, and desperate as the cries of your oppression, I have deeply failed in being Jesus, living His Gospel, and extending His Kingdom to you.

For Jesus did not consider His heavenly privilege with God as something to be used to His own advantage. Rather, He made Himself a minority by taking the very nature of the religiously oppressed, being made in true human likeness and meekness. Being found in appearance as humanity, He humbled Himself, standing in fierce solidarity with the least of these unto death—even death on a cross.

As Jesus has done for me, I will do also for you. We are all equal, affirmed, and loved in His sight—period, the end of all debates.

Black America, my heart is sickened to the core at the evil racism I have allowed and therefore have adopted as my own.

For I am white, I am Christian, I am the problem, and I am deeply sorry.

 

Grace is brave. Be brave.

I’m White, Christian, Privileged, and Ashamed

June 4, 2020 / / 11 Comments

There are moments in life where a truth can be so impacting it changes you forever—unhinging, transforming, and recalibrating nearly everything you once understood and believed.

I used to be a conservative, Evangelical, racist, homophobic, sexist, judgmental, and spiritually arrogant pastor and person. With no reservation, I pre-cataloged blacks as inferior and dangerous subhuman creatures, the LGBTQ community as mentally ill and spiritually depraved, and women as cupholders and casserole-makers for men.

In nearly every way, I was much the opposite of all that I am, hope to be, and stand for today. 

No, I didn’t finally reach the white quota of having enough black “friends” to look in the mirror and believe I’m not a racist. No, I didn’t have a child that came out as being gay or some moral failure or personal crisis that shook my foundations. The reversal of my heart and mind, and the dethroning of my racism, bigotry, hate, privilege, and conservatism came solely from being confronted by the true nature of God, the pure message of Jesus, and the revelation of His heart and mind towards all humanity.

To think that I painted inequality where there is none to see—a choice in sexual orientation where there is no choice to be. To think that gender ever mattered in calling, gifting, or creed—seeing women as some lessor form of a human being. To think that I condemned, in the name of Jesus, where there was no Jesus condemning. The evil ignorance of my white privilege blinded my perspective and deafened me to the real voices crying around me. 

To think that I loved with restrictions, restraint, and conditions—believed I had exclusive possession of all that is Truth to the exclusion of any other perspective or position. To think that I embraced a life and faith lacking in true compassion—leaving God-imaged people marginalized, discriminated, abused, alone, and undefended. To think that I lived and proclaimed it all as faith, faithfulness, and the way, Truth, and life—I am ashamed. Not just ashamed—disgusted. Not just disgusted, but wailing in ashes.

Look around.

Look at what many of us white, Christian, heterosexual, and privileged people have largely become—not all of us, but many—not always intentionally, but in sure reality.

Upon the necks of beautiful humans like George Floyd, our Jesus-grieving sins of racism, discrimination, white-supremacy, elitism, nationalism, ignorance, and condemnation are increasingly normalized, and even spiritualized as faithfulness. We have elected a childish, pussy-grabbing, womanizing, immoral, misogynistic, racist, and xenophobic president—touting him as a kind of God-appointed savior. 

Where our nationalistic, social, and political pursuits clearly conflict with the ways of Jesus, not to mention basic human ethics and morality, we conveniently turn a blind eye, and all of a sudden the “clear teachings of the Bible” aren’t so clear anymore and the compartmentalization of our faith becomes a worthy and important practice—smoke and mirrors were never so smokey and distracting. 

Still to this day, perhaps now more than ever, we harbor racism, boldly act on it, and even spiritually justify it, not to mention sexism, homophobia, and transphobia—all while ironically declaring ourselves to be the well from which genuine spiritual maturity flows. We can’t even stop the religious monster we have created long enough to seek true understanding in what it’s really like to not be white-skinned, heterosexual, Christian, or privileged. If only we knew how to listen as well as we know how to lean on and worship our own understandings and self-seeking ambitions. 

When a transgender person commits suicide at the hands of Christian condemnation, it’s like we don’t even pump the breaks or give a thought to reevaluating our faith understanding or position—arrogantly convinced we hold all the keys. Everyone else is always wrong and we are always right. Everyone else’s protest is an unworthy and blasphemous riot. Everyone else’s sin is destined for hell and ours is magically forgiven—thank God we believed the right things, said the right prayers, and made the right changes. Aren’t we all so special and so white.

While perhaps you are feeling oh-so special, I am feeling oh-so ashamed.

In fact, if this is what it means to be white, I don’t want to be “white” anymore.

If this is what it means to be Christian, I don’t want to be seen as “Christian” anymore.

If this is what it means to be heterosexual, privileged, or even American—you can have it all.

For Jesus flips the tables yet again in riot-ladened rebellion, revealing that we, in our undeniable worship of being white, heterosexual, Christian, American, and privileged are actuality the ones who have become the infected, pus-oozing, deplorable abomination. The finger pointers and speck removers are once again revealed to be the log possessors whose preoccupation with changing the world for Christ has left us tragically unaware of our own Christ-less souls.

Against this I must stand, turning shame for all that I had believed wrongly about God, Jesus, and people into an unstoppable solidarity with all that God has created good, beautiful, whole, and affirmed.

This is my resistance, this is my manifesto.

In the footsteps of Jesus, I’m a human that affirms all humans.

I’m a white man who sees as equal every shade of color and gender.

I’m a heterosexual that affirms every other kind of “sexual” rooted in honesty, love, and committed relationship.

I gladly surrender my privilege and tear off the “Christian” name tag.

I will no longer join hands nor heart with a faith understanding that fights against so much of what Jesus embraces.

I refuse to love, accept, and affirm any less than God who is pure Love, affirms, accepts, and loves me and all others without condition nor reversal.

For I am no better than any other—only different.

This is true of all people. Grace and Truth has made it so.

All are loved, equally and beautifully made—each a masterpiece, eternally valued and secured.

I will be forever brave on behalf of the “least of these,” proudly counting myself as equal among them, and manifest the delight of Jesus who is eternally proud to live, serve, sacrifice, and call them friend—as am I.

Ashamed, I am no less. Brave, I am, all the more.

 

Grace is brave.  Be Brave.

 

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