F*ck You, Space Billionaires

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Bezos, Branson, and whoever else is in the billionaire bitch mix.

I have something to say. 

We have something to say.

No, there is no illusion that you will listen nor consider the words. 

Yet still, hear the pounding sounds of countless shouting from the wilderness, with middle fingers raised firm and high, “F*ck you, space billionaires.”

That’s right, f*ck you and the space-cock you fly in.

I wish it weren’t true, but it’s the only linguistic that can suffice. You deserve every and all profanity because yours is a profane life.

It gives me no pleasure in declaring the truth that, while deemed the richest by some, you are, in fact, the poorest of the earth. Your heart, your compassion, your being, and your soul are thoroughly bankrupt. The debt you owe to society for your evil avarice and neglect towers high above the diabolical throne upon which you squat and drop your selfish stew all over the world. Connect all the piping throughout the world, no sewage system can contain your wasted life.

For your greed, not your wealth, has blinded you to the rest of the world. Your riches have become a veil to an empty, darkened, and diseased sense of purpose as to what it means to be human. 

We can see underneath the curtain of your wizardry. You have never set out to be generous, philanthropic, or even fair. If you had, you wouldn’t be a billionaire circle-jerking with your boys in space. Instead, every person your influence has touched would be living lives far removed from the burdens they carry. And, your life would be publicly common and secretly generous to the extreme.

But, that is not you, and that has not been your choice. You’re a taker, not a giver.

You have built your empire of materiality and self-centeredness on the backs of people. You didn’t achieve it, they did. The risks weren’t for their benefit, they were for yours. The hard work wasn’t for them, it was for you. 

When Jesus, a true man of greatness, cast a vision for His life, it was to help the world not exploit it, all at the cost of His sacrifice, not others.

When Jesus worked hard, it was to extravagantly and disproportionately care for and bless all people, not use them, abandon them, and run their lives into the ground.

When Jesus was given all power and authority in heaven and on earth, He immediately began washing people’s feet.

When you have been given virtually all power to change the world, you ride your cunt-capsule to the stars.

See the difference.

You are not the American dream, the European dream, or any dream. You are a scheme, through and through. You don’t live for people, you live from people; a leech raping all who are enslaved to the very economic system you exploit. A system of easy socialism for the top, and brutal capitalism for the bottom. Yet, regardless of one’s economic preferences or ideology, one pivotal truth remains–no one becomes a billionaire without becoming the equivalent sum of evil. 

But you don’t care, your life tells the story. You don’t give a shit, and that’s the problem.

Any good that you have done, which I am sure is worthy of applause, has unfortunately been a collateral blessing along your self-seeking pursuit to the title, “Narcissist of the World.”

You say, “Look at the jobs we have created, look at the science we have developed.” Bullshit, bullshit, and more bullshit. Your employees, the suffering, the world-changing potential of your power, and the environment all cry out, “bullshit.”

Imagine what you could do for planet earth.

Imagine what you could do for life-saving and life-giving medicine.

Imagine what you could do to end world poverty.

Imagine what you could do to rescue climate change.

Imagine what you could do for economic, educational, and judicial equality.

Imagine what you could do for mental, physical, and emotional health.

Imagine what you could do for the differently-abled.




Yet sadly, there is no need for imagination, you could easily do it all, and still have room for the gold-leafed toilet paper that wipes your cold, white ass.

But you don’t and you won’t, because you can’t see beyond the micropenis of your soul.

While others may bow and genuflect at your presence and power, I’m not impressed.

No, I’m disgusted at your disgustingness.

I would never want to be like you. 

Imagine the compromises, imagine the callousness, imagine the rationalizations, imagine the evil that would have to be adopted into one’s life and heart in order to become like you.

You are not success, you are not admirable, and you are not good. 

The devil’s crotch smells of flowers compared to your stench.

You are the worst of what humanity can become, not because of what you have done, but because of what you leave undone.

You literally have the power to change and transform the world. 

You literally have the power to positively and significantly impact every life on planet earth.

Let me repeat that for those in the back of your flying space dildo… 

You literally have the power to positively and significantly impact every life on planet earth. 

But you don’t, and you won’t.

You could literally save the world, but instead, you turn your back on it.

So, from my heart, our heart, the heart of planet earth, and all living things…

F*ck you, space billionaires.

F*ck you.


Grace is brave. Be brave.

.Check out Chris Kratzer’s book getting rave reviews… Stupid Shit Heard In Church.



  1. Br Graham-Michoel Wills OSBC

    Sometimes strong language is called for. The utterly selfish playboy behaviour of these two men is sickening. Having witnessed first-hand Richard Branson’s arrogant and selfish behaviour nothing he does surprises me. His quote: “To all you kids down there … “ including the kids in Syria that just had their homes bombed for the umpteenth time, all the kids, especially the girls, in Afghanistan who are about to lose their freedom of education, all the kids living off the goodwill of organisations such as Red Cross in refugee camps around the world, all the kids with leukaemia who cannot afford life saving drugs, all the kids who spend their days on the streets begging for food, all the kids who work in sweat shops 12-14-16 hours a day, all the kids who grow up surrounded by guns and drugs … … …

  2. Colby

    Could not have said it better Chris. Perfectly written, and devastatingly true. Heartbreaking, soul-crushing, and beyond comprehension. Just so deeply sad.

    • ckratzer

      Colby, thanks! And sure appreciate you taking the time to read and comment!

  3. Tony Cutty

    I love your work, Chris, but there’s one comment I need to make here: how do we know that the space billionaires are not helping good causes? They might be doing it secretly.

    Didn’t Jesus say that we should not announce our good works with trumpets? Certainly, when I give to worthy causes, or whatever good works I do, obey that commandment (and ok I’m not a billionaire! ;), ) so I never tell anyone, wherever possible not even the recipient. Could not the same be true of the billionaires?

    • ckratzer

      Tony, thanks for reading and commenting. I’m honored you enjoy my work. I hear your concern, and respect your perspective.
      In the article I specifically acknowledge that they are surely doing good things. However, if I give 10 cents to a homeless person I could say I am supporting a good cause. To me, it’s all in the balance. That so many things remain grossly unimpacted in the way they could be with just a small portion of their generosity gives evidence to me of their greed, not to mention the absence of living wages etc. for employees etc.

  4. Gloria Clause

    Sharp language. So how do you determine which parts of the Bible you believe and which parts you deny? Do you simply believe the ones that fit your agenda?

    • ckratzer

      As with all things, I see the Bible through the eyes of God who is Love and the mind of Christ within me.

  5. Gloria

    Why no reply Chris? Lol

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